Expatriate, You’re Coming Home在外的游子，你正在回家的路上

“怎么有这么多外国胖子？What’s with all the overweight foreigners?”
Getting off the plane, that was the first thing that came to my mind. I couldn’t help it. I had just spent a year in China, speaking Chinese, hanging out and working with Chinese people.
Coming home is a jarring experience. All of a sudden, everything and everyone is different. Readjusting forces me to rethink my experiences in both China and the U.S.
Each time I live in China and return to the U.S., I feel prouder of my country and its values than ever before. I appreciate American virtues that I do not see in modern China: a respect for and trust in one’s community, the belief that anyone can make a difference, a respect for law. I love the clean air, conversations with strangers in line, the availability of soap in restaurant bathrooms.
But I also feel more impatient with what I believe are modern America’s shortcomings. Yesterday, I went running through U.C. Berkeley. It was a beautiful day –– not a cloud in the sky in one of America’s most beautiful landscapes. But everything felt wrong to me. The soulless sterility of CVS, the homeless folks who make more than minimum wage by begging outside of Starbucks, the lavish sprawl of Northern California. This wasn’t the idealized Land of the Free and Home of the Brave I had cultivated in my mind over the past year in China.
I worry over the extreme preoccupation with following rules, indemnity, fairness. There’s little of those things in China. Air carriers will let you slide if your bag is a few pounds overweight. Young people feel pressure to stay physically fit. Businesses can make no-brainer decisions without worrying about lawsuits.
Of course, China faces the opposite extreme and pays the price for it. Minorities and the working class are almost absolutely marginalized.
But China and the U.S. are by no means opposites. They’re both cultures who are hardworking, proud, ambitious, eager to adapt and change.
The grit, the fight that I saw in my grandparents, who rose from poor descendants of Italian immigrants to middle class suburban Americans by believing in the power of education and working hard, is similar to the striving and self-reliance I see in many Chinese families today. I don’t see it so much in Americans these days.
That said, I think we have a lot to learn from each other. More on that next.
Coming back this time provides me a fresh perspective, but my questions remain the same: What does America stand for today? What do I stand for? How will China and the U.S. engage each other throughout my lifetime?

“怎么有这么多外国胖子？这些超重的外国人是怎么了？”

一下飞机，这是第一个冲到我的脑海里的问题，我没办法控制。我刚刚花了一年时间在中国生活，讲中国话，周围一起玩儿的和一起工作的都是中国人。

每次回家都是一次矛盾的经历。突然间，一切都变得不同了。调整迫使我重新考虑我的中国和美国经历。

每一次当我在中国生活了一段时间后，返回美国时，我会比以往任何时候都为自己的国家和它特有的价值观感到自豪。我很欣赏美国的种种美德和优点，很多是我在现代的中国看不到的：那是一种尊重和信任，在自己的圈子里，相信任何人都可以有所作为，还有对法律的尊重。我爱干净的空气，与排队的陌生人亲切的交谈，在任何餐厅的洗手间里都能看得到的香皂。

但我现在也对我认为的当代美国的缺点感到越来越不耐烦。昨天，我在加州大学伯克利分校里面跑步。这是美丽的一天 – 晴空万里，万里无云成为了美国最美丽的景观之一。但是，一切对我来说感觉却没那么好。没有主题乏味单调产品单一的CVS，在富饶的北加州越来越多的人通过在星巴克外面乞讨来赚取比最低工资多的钱。这不再是那个我在中国生活时向往的那个理想的自由国度和勇敢者的家园了。

我现在担心的当务之急是下面的规则，损害赔偿，公平公正。这些东西在中国很少有。航空公司会让你通过，如果你的包只是超重几磅。年轻人对于保持身材非常有压力。企业可以做没有脑子的决定而不用担心法律诉讼。

当然，中国面临的问题是另一个极端，它也为此付出了巨大的代价。少数民族和工人阶级几乎被完全边缘化了。

但是，中国和美国是没有办法的成为对立面的。他们是两种不同的文化，但却都是以勤劳，自豪，有事业心，渴望适应和改变而著称的。

类似的努力，自力更生，我在现在许多中国家庭中看到了我爷爷奶奶那一辈，他们从意大利移民的后裔和城郊中产阶级美国人的孩子，通过相信教育的力量和后天的努力而成长起来的那种奋斗和挣扎。但在现在的美国社会中，我却很少再看到了。

也就是说，我觉得我们两个国家有很多互相学习的地方。未来会有更多需要学习的地方。

这次回来，为我提供了一个全新的视角，但我的问题仍然是相同的：如今的美国究竟代表什么呢？我的立场又是什么？我又该如何将中国和美国的经历融进我的一生中呢？