“Fashion” meant nothing to me as a little girl. I remember this hideous outfit I owned: a forest green sweatshirt-sweatpants duo that had Sailor Moon plastered on them. Growing up, I had puffy sleeved velvet dresses for dinner occasions, but otherwise my wardrobe consisted of hand-me downs from my cousins. In fact, every time they decided to go through their closet and give me the discards, I was thrilled because whatever they gave me seemed to be the best looking things in my outdated dresser.
None of this really bothered me then. My parents were hard working immigrants who needed to pay the mortgage and put food on the table, so clothes weren’t exactly a priority. Besides, I was a bookworm who had her nose dug deep into another new novel each week. But there were times when some comments pricked, like when a snooty girl in high school walked up to be and asked, “Do you wear that jacket every day?” Talk about sting.
In high school, my closet began to evolve, but far from what it is today. I became good friends with a girl, Annie, who held open the shopping mall door for me. She was a diva, and such was her style. Sadly, my style and preference strayed far from hers. I began to shop on my own, and only then did my sense of style evolve.
I shot up in height in middle school. I was that tall, lanky Asian girl. For some time, I wistfully wished to be that cute, adorable Asian girl, but I couldn’t be cute – not when I was tall. But then I learned to own my looks. Instead of cute, I could be chic. Knowing my style now seems to help me know who I am. I don’t wear pink lace, or low-cut cleavage sweaters, or baggy T-shirts. I can wear maxi dresses and floor length gowns that my shorter, cute friends would swim in. I learned to love my body type. My fashion is a sign of being comfortable in my own skin.
When I say “fashion,” I don’t mean I obsess over every magazine that comes my way. Or that I stream fashion runways left and right. I don’t mean we should wear neon lipstick or put a bird’s nest in our hair. Personally, I think fashion is getting a good sense of who you are and who you want to be. And it’s a bonding session. I know a true friend when we go shopping together and share similar tastes and similar views on money. Someone who enjoys what you enjoy, without making you feel like shopping is a solo activity, someone who is truly happy when you found that shoe or shirt you’ve always wanted.
I love being that person for my friends. I’ve shown a friend the perfect tinted Chap Stick, another the perfect red lipstick. I once transformed a friend from a hoodie, curve-hiding gamer to a stunning head-turner – but it was still within her comfort zone and style. Clothes shouldn’t make us into someone else – we choose them to express ourselves.
“时尚”对我这样一个小女孩还说一点意义都没有。