On Success and Relationship: Go Big or Go Home?关于成功与关系：去大城市还是回家?

Six months ago, as I folded up my T-shirts and jeans into my suitcase, I looked around my room at home and wondered when I’d be back. I pondered making a promise to myself – that I wouldn’t return until I’d achieved an accomplishment of grandiose scale in Los Angeles. Starring in a TV show. Winning an award. Getting featured in a magazine. Thinking of Charlize Theron’s Oscar acceptance speech when she cited how her mother had given her a one-way ticket from South Africa and with the precise instruction not to come back until she’d fulfilled her acting dreams, I considered putting equal weight onto my one-way ticket to Los Angeles. Good thing I realized how ludicrous a promise that would have been to rigidly enforce upon myself, a self-proclaimed homebody and a San Franciscan native (only an hour’s flight away from LA).

After my move to Los Angeles, I’ve returned back to San Francisco four times: in late August for an IBM commercial audition that my SF agent found me, at the end of September for my mom’s birthday, on Black Friday for Thanksgiving weekend, and this past weekend for Christmas vacation.

Each journey back – via airplane and Megabus – has re-energized and reinvigorated me. I’ve had new details and stories to report back, new people to describe, and new photos to share with my mom. As we’ve swapped our experiences over dim sum, homemade dinner, or dessert, I’ve been grateful for the chance to catch up in person and see that home has not changed. It’s still the same comfortable sanctuary where I feel taken care of and loved.

Following graduation, I realized what a large and sometimes lonely place the real world can be. No more dorms, dining halls, or campus-wide social events. However, thanks to G-chat, social media, Southwest’s “wanna get away” deals, and the new SoCal – NorCal Megabus route, I know that I am never too far from the invaluable support that only comes from my network of both friends and family. As one of my friends told me before graduation, “we travel so we can have stories to tell when we come back.”

六个月以前，当我整理好我的T恤和牛仔裤，放进我的行李箱，我在家环视了一圈我的房间，思忖着我什么时候会回来。我沉思之后，给自己一个约定——我不会回来，直到我在洛杉矶取得足够大的成绩。出演电视节目，获得一个奖励，出现在杂志中为人所知——我想到查理兹·塞隆的奥斯卡提名演讲，她提到她妈妈是如何给了她一张从南非启程的单程机票，给予她严格的命令——不要回来，直到她实现了她的演艺梦为止，我就考虑给我自己同样的压力，买了一张单程前往洛杉矶的票。我意识到这是一件很棒的事情，一个看似荒唐的约定却将会严格地强迫我——一个喜欢呆在家里的男人，一个旧金山本地人（从旧金山到洛杉矶只有一个小时的飞行旅程）。

当我搬到洛杉矶之后，我四次回到旧金山：在最近的八月底参加一个我在旧金山的代理人要我参加的IBM的商业面试，在九月底参加我妈妈的生日聚会，在黑色星期五回家过感恩节周末，还有过去的这个星期回家过圣诞假期。

每一次回家的旅程，无论是飞机还是Megabus，都再次激励着我，让我振奋。我有新的生活和故事告诉家人，有新结识的人们可以向家里人描述，还有新的照片和我妈妈分享。当我们在吃点心、家庭自制晚餐、或者甜点时交换着我们的经历，我非常高兴能够有这样的机会能和家里人交谈并且看到家里一如往昔。家仍然是我舒适的港湾，我在这里感到被关怀，被爱。

在毕业之后，我意识到真实的世界是多么的广大且时时孤独的存在着。不再是大学时的寝室，餐厅或者学校处处可见的社交活动。然而，感谢G-chat，社交媒体，西南的“想要逃离”系列活动，还有新的从南加州到北加州的Megabus路线，我知道我从未远离那些仅仅来自我的社交网络（朋友和家人）无可估量的支持。正如我的一个朋友在毕业前对我所说的那样：“我们旅行，因此当我们回家时有故事可说。”