I attended a fantastic yoga class several weeks ago that awakened my senses and opened my “Qi” (气).
Our yoga teacher Alex, a tall and fit woman, tip-toed into the studio room and began the class: “I want us to start on our backs – slowly breathing in and out. We (New Yorkers) have this cultural bias against rest. We’re always on the go, we’re always running around doing things. We love activities, we can’t or won’t rest. We can’t relax.”
“That’s me!” I exclaimed in silence, while breathing in and out on the mat. I love work, I love activities, I’m always on the go.
As I was thinking to myself how I packed my day with work-related tasks, social events and other personal interests, Alex carried on with her instruction.
“While you are lying flat on your backs, I want you to relax – listen and notice the quality of your breath. Relax…and let go. ”
“Let go.” I mumbled to myself – “huum.”
Having been a television network producer for years, the mantra “let go” is not exactly a daily regimen in the deadline-driven journalism world. What was the daily regimen? Let’s go! Let’s roll! Let it rip!
Now that I am an independent professional, I have a different set of expectations for myself. First and foremost – as the head of my own company -I can’t be breathless! With the hyper-ventilating daily news theater behind me, I now hear “let go” in a totally different light.
“Let go” somehow leads my senses to tune into my own breath, and, as our yoga teacher said,
“Listen and notice the quality of your breath.”
I could hear and feel how short, uneven and truncated my breath had been even as I was lying flat on the mat. Why was I out of breath?
Well…I had been sick for three weeks with a fever and bronchitis just before that yoga class. My body was still feeling fatigued, and my mind foggy. A Cantonese-Chinese phrase suddenly popped into my head – (不 顺 气). In English, it literally means one’s breath (“qi” 气 ) is not smooth (不 顺 气). I felt (不 顺 气) uneven breath, or shortness of breath.
In Hong Kong where I grew up, I heard my mom say this often about her breath (“qi” 气 )–that it was uneven (不 顺 气) every time she was upset or irritated or stressed out. She’d immediately drink some hot tea to even out or nurse her “qi” (气 ). I remember seeing her sipping piping hot Chinese black tea to regain her “qi” (气 ) and looking and feeling better afterwards.
In reflection, I realized that even when I myself was sick, I was not completely resting. In fact, I was restless. I was unable to “let go.” I was constantly thinking about a list of endless tasks I needed to do to form and launch my new company – from the legal process of establishing the business, to the fund-raising, production, programming, interviewing and staffing aspects of the enterprise.
My breath had been acting like my body’s little agent, sending me a pulsating signal that I needed to “let go,” but I ignored it.
Now – letting go means I do the best I can, then release my mind and body to relax. Letting go also means I need to free my mind and body from the anxieties of the every-day “to do” list, and to nurture the basic fuel of life – breath. (气)
In yoga practice now, I’ve re-discovered the importance of smooth breath (顺 气) – the key not only to health and well-being, but also to harmony and joy.
几个礼拜前，我上了一个瑜珈课。这节课不仅让我全身的感官都唤醒了而且也打开了我的气。
我们的瑜伽老师，ALEX ，是一位又高又瘦的女人。她悄悄地走进健身房开始上课：“我们现从趴在后背上开始，慢慢的呼吸。 我们纽约人对休息有一个从内心的反对。我们永远都在忙，永远都在跑来跑去做东西。我们特别爱活动，我们不能也不会休息。我们不会放松”
“那就是我！”我自己在安静中喊了一声 （当然是在我的头里）。我爱工作，我爱活动，我永远都在做事儿。
当我在想一天怎么可能把工作和娱乐都做了，ALEX接着教我们。
“趴在后背上，我要你们放松－注意听你自己的呼吸。放松。。。“
”放松“ 我跟我自己讲 “哦米拖佛”
我当了很多年电视台制片人，他们一直都说：“放松”不是传媒这个专业力容易做的一件事情。那天天想的是什么呢？“走！接着来！一直往前走！”
现在我是一位独立的专业人，我也对我自己有自己的要求了。第一就是，当做我自己的老总，我不可能不呼吸！现在有换气过度的天天新闻剧院，“放松”这单词儿对我有很不同的意思。
“放松”就让我注意到我的每一个呼吸。就像我们的瑜伽老师说的“听，注意到你自己的呼吸”
我注意到我的呼吸变的越来越段。我都已经躺在地上了。可是我的气怎么越来越短了呢？
上瑜珈课之前，我是生了三个礼拜的病，一直发烧，嗓子也发炎。我的身体非常累，头也有点晕。我想起一句广东话：“不顺气”。英文的意思就是一个人的呼吸不顺气。我觉得气短儿，也就是不顺气。
我是在香港长大的，经常听到我妈妈生气的时候说自己的气“不顺气”。她会很快喝热茶或想办法顺顺气。我记得她慢慢的喝黑茶相帮助顺她的气。每次喝完了就会舒服很多。
回想起来，我发现虽然我生病了，我从来都没让自己休息休息。我根本就休息不了。我没办法“放松”。我永远都在想我做不完的事情。永远都在想怎么可以好好修理我的公司－从法律方面到经济方面 到筹款，制作，编程，面试和人手方面的企业。
我的气就像在给我的身子发小信号，告诉我需要“放松”，可是我完全没有意识到。
现在，“放松”是我最需要做的事情。把我的头和身子都放开，放松。不要天天想我需要做的那些事情。我需要养一养我的气。
在瑜伽课里，我从新发现了顺气的重要性。顺气不只对身体健康有用，也可以帮助我们更快乐，保持平安。